Bleh.

12:43am: Holy crap an update!
Kinda amazed that LJ is still around..Its been ages! Anyway, things still kinda suck. Money is tight, though i did manage to get my job back after quite a bit of legal mumbo jumbo. Hurray underpaid crap! Anyway, currently freezing my balls off up in Cape Cod. Its a really nice place though, once you get around the fact that its like 27 degrees tonight. Oh well, I guess thats about it for now.

6:19pm: Kings of Chaos.

Badass game, now click this link. http://www.kingsofchaos.com/recruit.php?uniqid=bvpexe78 

Go there, click the right number, and if ya wanna play be my officer, so I can wreck people harder. :)

Do it five times a day, the more clicks i get the more ownage ensues.

3:12am: Yay. Boredom.

Well, things are ALMOST starting to look up, got an interesting job offer, but still waiting on it to be finalized. Hopefully it does, because it entails buckets of money, and I'll be the envy of almost everyone I know. But hey, it hasn't gone through yet, so I can't celebrate yet. I'm just keeping my fingers crossed hoping it doesn't fall through like everything else seems to. Cars almost broken down for good, so thats gonna be fun trying to get out of the house, let alone the complete and utter lack of gas money. Hurray being broke. 

On an unrelated but similarly shitty note, being single sucks. It's been almost a year, and everyone in this city, and probably this entire state, is uninteresting. I should move, but meh. That requires money, which is something I am lacking at the moment. On the plus side though, at least I got internet back to pass the time with. Yay, I guess.

1:08am: Woo..suck.

Shit's really starting to piss me off. No one's hiring, and being broke really sucks. And to make matters worse, I STILL can't get something/someone that I should have stopped worrying about almost 2 years ago now out of my head...Im starting to wonder if I ever will..but, she's been nothing but a bitch to me for the past few months nonstop, so, fuck her. In lighter news, I'm finally getting a decent computer with internet at my house next week....joy. Now if only everything else would finally fall back into place, I'd be good.

BTW: anyone whos planning on going on any vacations or travelling anytime soon, go here: http://www.ytbtravel.com/moppo

11:43am: Meh.

Been a while since I put anything in this. Oh well..probably isn't anyone that reads this anymore anyway but whatever. 

Pretty shitty time for me right now. Just lost my job for a bullshit reason, again...god I hate corporate america, and I'm still feeling reminiscent about things that have already come and gone in the past...and kinda wish were still around...

Shits gotta start looking up right? I mean theres always a light at the end of the tunnel right? I sure hope so...even though that light never lasts..if its even there to begin with...I just need some reprieve from this steady stream of bullshit called Life...at least for a little bit.

4:31pm: Yay phoenix AZ! Its sooooooo brown out here im not used to it...i kinda miss all the green...but, meh, its nto humid so the 110 degrees out here feels like 85 florida weather so yay not sweating my balls off!!!

12:11pm:

Wow. Been a while since I last posted on here. Oh well I guess thats what happens when your computer blows up on you. Time to get a new one, and maybe get a new life while I'm at it. This one sucks. People need to make up their fucking minds and stop playing around with things, and stop being hypocrites.

12:00pm: Hmm.
List ten songs you really love right now and tag four people to do the same.

1: Cradle of Filth - Saffron's Curse
2: Cradle of Filth - Summer Dying Fast
3: Divinity Destroyed - Haven
4: Lordi - My Heaven Is Your Hell
5: Divinity Destroyed - Forsaken
6: Metallica - Until it Sleeps
7: She Wants Revenge - Tear You Apart(Guessing thats the name, its the one on the radio)
8: Cradle of Filth - Death Magick for Adepts
9: Cradle of Filth - Absinthe With Faust
10: The Offspring - The Kids Aren't Alright

Who I'm Tagging: with reasons
Kristen: Cause you touched my hair-.-
Jon: Untaggable? I scoff at thee.
Laura: See if you still read my LJ:P
Alfred: RED ROCKET!

11:38am: Jacked Quizzes

You fit in with: Scientology Your ideals mostly resemble those of the Scientology faith. You strive to find the truth in all matters, but you also have a lot of faith in people and things. You are very logical, smart and charismatic and you value the truth above all else. 20% scientific. 20% faith-oriented.

Take this quiz at QuizGalaxy.com

Kinda makes sense...but kinda doesnt at the same time.

Your Social Dysfunction: Normal Being average in terms of how social you are, as well as the amount of self-esteem you have, you're pretty much normal. Good on you.

Take this quiz at QuizGalaxy.com Please note that we aren't, nor do we claim to be, psychologists. This quiz is for fun and entertainment only. Try not to freak out about your results.

Um...bullseye?

12:18am: Yay chainletters.
Body: Girls: When you want to cuddle with him, tell him you're cold
Guys: automatically move closer to her. (if your stupid then you'll either say" me too " or you'll give her your jacket... don't)


Girls: During a movie, if he puts his arm around you, tilt your head on his shoulder
Guys: lift her chin up and kiss her.


Guys: When she tells you she loves you, look deep into her eyes, give her a peck on the lips, and tell her you love her too... and mean it.


Girls:When you're both laying under the stars, put your head on his chest and close your eyes as you listen to his steady heart beat
Guys: whisper in her ear and link your hands with hers.



Now make a wish about something you would like to happen
between you and your crush....



* ** *** **** *****
*********** ********** ********* ******** *******
******
***** **** *** ** * * ** *** **** ***** ******
******* ******** ********* ********** ***********
************
******************* ****************** *****************
**************** *************** **************
*************
************ *********** ********** ********* ********
*******
****** ***** **** *** ** * * ** *** **** ! *****
******
******* ******** ********* ********** ***********
************
************* ************** ***************
****************
**************** ****************** *******************
******************** ********************* ************
***********
********** ********* ******** ******* ***************
************** ************* ************ ***********
**********
********* ******** ******* ****** ***** **** *** **
*
* ** *** **** *****
*********** ********** ********* ******** *******
******
***** **** *** ** * * ** *** **** ***** ******
******* ******** ********* ********** ***********
************
******************* ****************** *****************
**************** *************** **************
*************
************ *********** ********** ********* ********
*******
****** ***** **** *** ** * * ** *** **** ! *****
******
******* ******** ********* ********** ***********
************
************* ************** ***************
****************
**************** ****************** *******************
******************** ********************* ************
***********
********** ********* ******** ******* ***************
************** ************* ************ ***********
**********
********* ******** ******* ****** ***** **** *** **
**
*********


STOP!! STOP!! STOP!! STOP!!

-now copy and repost this. if you don't you'll have bad relationships for 69 years

by 12pm tonight ur 1 true love will realize how much they want you.
if you don't repost this, your life (not just love life) will have bad luck forever !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

6:11pm: Ripped.
"If there is someone on your friends list you would like to take, strip naked, tie them to a bed post, lick them until they scream, then fuck them until both of you are senseless and unable to fuck anymore, then wait about five minutes and do it all over again, then post this exact sentence in YOUR journal."

She knows who she is.....I wuv mah Nikki!:)

6:32pm: A reason to update.
Just cause Jon did it.

( See my comment statistics )


I love mah Nikki:)

3:34pm: Tagged..? I dunno.
Instructions: List your six current favorite songs; then tag six more people to do the same...

1: Saffron's Curse - Cradle of Filth
2: Nymphetamine - Cradle of Filth
3: Summer of 69 - Bon Jovi
4: Suicide and Other Comforts - Cradle of Filth
5: Lamb of God - Marilyn Manson
6: Redeemer - Marilyn Manson

TAG 6 people:
1: migotojisatsu
2: metsys
3: enigmaburn007
4: boundindarkness
5: masterroshix
6: bidrummerchick

11:46pm: Wtf...why didn't I ace it?

English Genius You scored 100% Beginner, 100% Intermediate, 93% Advanced, and 93% Expert!

You did so extremely well, even I can't find a word to describe your excellence! You have the uncommon intelligence necessary to understand things that most people don't. You have an extensive vocabulary, and you're not afraid to use it properly! Way to go! Thank you so much for taking my test. I hope you enjoyed it! For the complete Answer Key, visit my blog: http://shortredhead78.blogspot.com/.

My test tracked 4 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender: You scored higher than 75% on Beginner You scored higher than 67% on Intermediate You scored higher than 58% on Advanced You scored higher than 95% on Expert

Link: The Commonly Confused Words Test written by shortredhead78 on OkCupid Free Online Dating

I need to go back to school-.-.

9:42pm: Infrequent updates are awesome.
Mainly cause i have nothing to say. Other than, I feel like an asshole. I'm kinda doing the same thing that a certain someone did to me not too long ago. It's funny how things turn around...although, I don't get it. I hated what she did, it tore me apart, and yet, I'm beginning to do the same thing now..? I realize whats happening, and yet I'm not making a physical effort to stop it?...I'm becoming everything I hated about Lauren. Sigh. I dunno. I'm confused.

7:30pm: Well, lag is awesome.
I just decided I feel like playing UT since I haven't in forever, then I remembered, my bandwidth currently sucks animal penis. So here's a reminder kids, if you're on a local hub with a cable ISP such as roadrunner, please do NOT use your dick as a network cable! It tend's to eat bandwidth like Fat Bastard eats children at a daycare center. Thanks, and remember, cords, not cock!

PS: to show an example of the masticating of the genitals, my connection to LJ timed out as I attempted to update. Thanks again to those of you sharing the local hub!

1:15pm: Pretty cool pic at least.

You are sad because of your grief


Why are you sad? [amazing pictures] For darker people
brought to you by Quizilla

5:52am: That was an interesting dream.
Somehow I landed myself in some kind of death match with some chick, complete with lots of debris that could be used as weapons and a kind of maze like building. After about an hour and a half of cat and mouse, she finds some large wooden...club? with nails sticking out of it and starts looking for me. I'm on a floor above her and see her coming up the stairs, hide around the corner with a kind of wooden panel, and smash her when she comes around the corner. I then pick up some kind of small 2x4 or something to try to fight with, and she picks up the panel, having dropped her previous weapon, and that happens to have nails sticking out of it too. She proceeds to start swinging it at me, when I block it by throwing my stick at her, and tripping her to the floor. At this point, I find a hacksaw and slam the blunt end into her head as I move down over her, to stun her. Then I held the blade up to her throat, where she kinda nodded in defeat, and held her head back to prepare for the end. So i sawed her head off..then I woke up.:/

6:13pm: Sigh.
Why won't it go away?..it's been over a third of a year now..and its still with me as strong as ever..Why won't it leave? Why do I keep thinking back on it?..I already know what I lost, and that theres no going back...so why do I keep finding myself looking upon it? Some memories should be forgotten..and this is one of them. But for some reason I just can't forget it..

8:10am: Omfg work=teh suck.
I do not feel like going in today at all. I'm way too fucking tired......bleh..I want to go to sleep until like monday or something! I don't want to work this many days in a row without a day off again EVER!

1:21am: ..
"I'll always be with you." Those words still echo silently through the emptiness that was once my life, reminding me of what I can never have, and yet am tormented with daily. The only thing I wanted was to have someone to share my life with, but everytime I reach for something, it vanishes before my eyes, ever taunting me with visions of a gift that will never be mine. Every time I grasp the air where there had once been something to hold on to, I feel myself sink deeper into that bottomless pit of despair fate has crafted exclusively for me and me alone. Each moment that passes takes away another shard of what little hope I had managed to cling on to for so long..and soon, there won't be anything left..and I myself will start to fade into that same nothingness that has slowly consumed the rest of me..

11:44pm: -.-
Just revisiting the fact that I hate being single. And I doubt that's gonna change any time soon.

12:22am: Call me Hitch.
You're welcome Kristen...lol. NOW GIMME DEM COOKIES!! And the topping..:P

5:53pm: Random.
If i could be any fictional character, I'd be God.

1:38am: Yay for spacing out.
I had an odd little dream today in which, end result was someone shot me in the face repeatedly with an AK47, and I'm pretty sure I died in the dream because I just remember 5 minutes of nothing but a black void, then I woke up, and my face hurt immensely. No big deal, until later tonight. I spaced out in the middle of Lake Helen, for whatever reason, and just random incoherent streams of ideas and memories started flashing in my mind. I already told Kristen some of what it was, but one other major thing that stood out was that dream again...specifically that endless black void between me "dying", and me waking up. It seemed so serene..so peaceful...inviting, almost. And I started thinking that maybe it wasn't all that bad after all..and I kinda started drifting back into that part of the dream again..right there leaning up against that wooden building out there, I literally felt myself letting go and drifting back into that calm emptiness again, until Kristen like kicked the wood frame or something that basically shocked me out of it. Another little tidbit that was hanging over my head the whole time it happened was that..well..maybe the problem with all my failed relationships wasn't them..maybe it really was me?..Maybe I'm really just not good enough..maybe there really was something I could have done to save all those failures, I just was too dumb to see it..and still can't see it..the problem was me all along..not them..I dunno. I don't know what the hell is going on anymore. I don't know what the fuck is wrong with me lately.